A little while ago I read a really great book by the incredible Steve Bidulph's and he dedicated a chapter of said book to celebrating girls periods and it really got me thinking. When I was a young girl, I was rather late to the party and didn't actually start my period until at least 14 years old. At the time, I remember feeling like a weirdo, why hadn't I started my period and all my friends had. I missed out on conversations about periods because I couldn't relate. I wasn't able to flunk out of swimming (in the outdoor freezing pool) like they could, because I didn't have 'my period' as an excuse. It was just one more thing to have to contend with as a teen. So when I did finally start, it was more of a 'thank goodness', I'm normal, now let's just get on with life. The whole thing passed by without celebration and why should it, why celebrate this sort of thing, I mean, it was awful. My views on periods were very much taken from my older sisters and my mum. Basically, you have a period every month, it's gross, you get moody, get spots and are unbearable to live with for 3-7 days! Who wants to celebrate that?!
However, after reading Steve Bidulphs, 10 Things Girls Need Most, I realised that it would be a travesty to put my 'inherited' negative views on to my own daughters, so I started talking more positively about my periods and being more open with them about it all. Rather than moaning about mine and making out they were the worst thing on the planet to happen to a women. He fully supported the celebration of our daughters 'coming of age' and made he realise how very special that time in a girls life actually is and that I would be missing a huge opportunity in their lives if I just let 'starting their periods', pass by without any proper acknowledgment.
Steve suggested buying or making a gift box especially for your daughter, which would make her feel special on the day so I purchased a First Period gift box for my daughter a few months before she started her period so it would be ready on the day.
I couldn't wait to give her the box because I wanted her to know that I was really excited that she had started her period and I wanted to welcome her into womanhood by marking the occasion with a special gift box full of all the things she was going to need from this day on. I would highly recommend this throughtful gesture, if your daughter hasn't had her first period yet. I got mine from Etsy (just search First Period Gift Boxes).
I also read up a bit more around the menstrual cycle so that I could speak from truth to them and I started to understand on a deeper level the true magnificence of a women's monthly cycle and actually started to love my body that bit more. Rather than feeling embarrassed or guilty for my hormones playing up I embraced it. Rather than making jokes about 'time of the month', I started to explain to my girls that I may be feeling a little this or a little that and it was completely fine as it was all part of my monthly cycle. I made sure not to begrudge my cycle in front of them, I mean, they wouldn't be here if I didn't have one and I told them that! There's nothing embarrassing and scary about that!
Our menstrual cycle isn't just the days that we bleed, during the entire month-long cycle we experience a whole host of changes including different moods, emotions and energy levels as our hormones rise and fall. I downloaded the app Clue, so that I could keep track of my cycle and the changes my body and mind went through and that was the first bit of advice I gave my daughter when she had her first period.
We also talked about the best ways to handle your body during your menstrual cycle, in order to reduce the negative side affects that can happen as a result, such as bad tummy cramps, PMS, blemishes and bloating.
Here are some of the DON'T's that you might want to talk to your daughter about:
Don't give in to salt cravings - it can cause even more bloating and discomfort
Don't skip meals and eating junk food - as tempting as this is, it's only going to make you feel more lethargic and irritable.
Don't wear the same sanitary protection all day - remember to change often as towels or tampons can be a breeding ground for bacteria.
Don't drink coffee as this can lead to digestive issues such as diarrhoea
And here are some of the DO's:
Do drink lots of water as this helps with bloating and water retention
Do eat leafy green vegetables to boost iron levels, spinach is also rich in magnesium
Do eat fruits such watermelon and cucumber to help keep you hydrated and curb sugar cravings.
Do drink Ginger tea to help reduce inflammation and reduce nausea.
Do eat fish as it is a nutritious addition to your diet and helps with dipping iron levels, is full of omega-3s and can help with mood swings and depression.
Do have a few squares of dark chocolate (this ones a winner with my daughters because they love Bournville anyways), on the plus side dark chocolate is rich in magnesium, which helps reduce PMS symptoms.
Do take supplements such as Iron, Magnesium. Zinc, Omega-3 and B Vitamins if you don't get them from your diet.
Whether you a Mum or a Dad, make sure you do your research because this can be an extremely scary and embarrassing time for your daughter, but it needs to be normalised and celebrated as an amazing milestone in her young life.
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